A Little Credit......

Well, if the title isn't a loaded question, I don't know what is!

Anyone who's read my previous posts knows I have a daughter with Asperger's.  Well, several months back, we joined a local Charlotte group of Aspies.  It's been great!!  In fact, I think I enjoy the group more than my daughter.

I talk to this group (my new friends) and am just amazed at how smart and open they are!  Sure, they have difficulties in social situations and so forth, but who doesn't from time to time.  I've become close to some in the group and really enjoy my conversations with them.  It's actually helped me with Halee as well, since a lot of the group are adults.  They know they're different and try to make up for it.  Honestly, I don't see where they need to make up for anything.  So, they're different....so what?!

We're all different!!  Isn't that the point?  Superficially, we're all different.  Fundamentally, we're all the same.  We want to be liked and accepted for who we are.  Everyone wants to be happy....and coming to that:

I had a conversation this past weekend from one of the members of the Aspie Group and it got pretty deep.  Which suits me just fine!  We started talking about happiness and choices.  He couldn't believe that I had had any bad or depressing moments in my life.  He said, "But you seem so Happy-Go-Lucky".  I told him it was my choice to be so.  I could wallow in those bad moments in my life or I could take the lessons offered and make myself a better, more compassionate person.  I choose the latter....always will.  I told him the bad things are always in your face, but it seems the good things are harder to find.  But, most people live with their eyes closed.  The happiest things in life are the simplest....the rising of the sun, the wind through your hair, a child's laugh.

Is it right that we take those things for granted?  And I know everyone right now (especially in this country) are feeling things in a bad way.  But, isn't this time when we should be coming together?  To realize that that fancy car or house isn't what is going to make us truly happy?  Everyone is into the "blame game" as well.  Blaming the current president, blaming other countries, blaming the other guy.  What about blaming yourselves?  No one forced us to buy the big houses, over-extend our credit, not plan for the future.  These problems started long ago.....it's called GREED!!  And we are all to blame for it in one form or another.

But, that can change.  We know what the problems are, so let's start looking for the solutions.  I guess that's where my exchanges with the Aspie Group have helped.  I look at the day-to-day issues they face, with social  skills, anxieties, the works. A lot of them feel overwhelmed on a daily basis and have for years.  Now, can you imagine that for yourself?  What we feel is felt ten-fold by them!  But, talking with them and helping them......I help not only myself, but everyone around me.  I tell them, work on one thing at a time.  Make a choice to be happy.

I was asked if that was hard to do on a daily basis.  YES!!  But, again, I could choose to live my life in fear or pain as well.  I much prefer happiness.  It really is worth the effort.  I've told them to find that one thing that calms them.  Use it as meditation, if you like.  So then, when things seem out of control focus on that one thing that makes you calm.

And then again, (Have I said how much I love this group?) they asked about those who have no choice.  Say, if you're faced with an impossible situation.  I told them it's still a choice.  If someone is holding a gun at your head, threatening to shoot....you can either shoot them first or allow them to shoot you.  IT'S A CHOICE.  Never said all the choices we make were good ones, just that they are choices.  And once you realize that, it becomes easier to take that road less traveled....plus, it's more fun ;-)

Granted, you can't be happy all the time.  How would one understand what true happiness is if you never experienced the pain and suffering of life?  They go hand in hand.  We just have to learn to be there for one another.  Lately, it's been about "me, me, me" and not enough "we, we, we".  That truly needs to change if the human race is to survive as a whole.  By helping others, we truly help ourselves.  And I don't mean just throwing money at the situation.  I mean, really listening to those around you.  Most of the time, they just want to know they've been heard.

Think about it and let me know YOUR thoughts.

Until next time.........have a glorious day!